Marriage is such a complex demand on life for those who have no extra communication issues. It can only be imagined the possible complexities for either or both partners struggling with communication deficits.
As a couple committed to our relationship, and always wanting to grow and do better, we committed this week to attend a series of marriage enrichment sessions at Minds & Hearts clinic during the months of October and November.
I had an individual preparation session this past week where the staff of the clinic reviewed my case and how I felt about the program before asking me what I hope to get out of the program. I was honest in indicating some of the areas I would like our relationship to grow as well as some areas I think we are doing well. The surprising question that caught me unprepared was when the therapist asked me if I love my husband.
"Absolutely!" was my reply. She stopped for a moment before suggesting that we might be in the minority and that for most of the couples attending the sessions, this course was likely their last ditch effort to save their marriages. She felt the need to prepare my husband as the neurotypical partner that he would likely be hearing lots of negativity in his sessions as the partners unloaded their frustration at their autistic spouses. Not sure how we feel about going now. The therapist's view is that we will be a great balancing and encouraging influence. Hopefully we will be able to show that with knowledge and compromise and respect and love, marriage on the spectrum can be happy and beautiful. I guess we will know soon enough.... Watch this space.
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